| Vintage Reading® Stories Heard Over the Back Fence
"A Man of Upstanding Qualities"
Adapted from a 1908 short story
By Rita and Victor Buday
APRIL 2008 :: © 2008 Buday Books / Vintage Reading ®
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Some say Politics is the "Art of Compromise," negotiating an acceptable middle ground. Others say Politics is "Preaching Four-Square Honesty" (while an accomplice steals the shingles off the Courthouse roof). More times than we like to think, both explanations are correct.
Then there are the political workers behind the scenes--you might call them facilitators--who hand-pick the candidates, carefully organize "spontaneous demonstrations" of public support, and know which leading citizens have fat checkbooks with a desire to travel to the Political Promised Land.
"Rupert" was The Facilitator in our State. Most people had never heard of him--couldn't pick him out of a police line-up--but to those concerned, they knew who was meant when they heard "Ask Rupert," "What did Rupert say?" or "Rupert wants an explanation--right now!"
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Rupert seemed to enjoy the sunny morning as he rode along a country road, when suddenly he pulled off to the side and stopped. Adam Grimm, plowing a field, saw him and came over to visit.
"G'Mornin' Adam. Nice day isn't it?"
"G'Mornin'. Good day for plowing."
Rupert flicked a pebble at a clod of dirt, waiting for the spirit to move him toward something else.
"Heard much political talk lately?" Rupert asked.
"Nope; no point. We don't count for much in politics this part of the State; nobody listens to us anyway."
"That's no way to look at it, Adam. There's a chance for a new man to go to the Legislature after the coming election. Why don't you try and go run for it?"
"Me?"
"Sure. Be a great chance for you."
Without a word, Adam turned and went back to his plowing. Rupert was surprised. "Not much for talking is he? But I've got the seed planted; he's going to think on it quite a bit unless I miss my guess."
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A half-mile down the road Rupert stopped again--to talk politics with another farmer, Jonas Ritter.
"Been watching the political situation, Jonas?"
"Some," answered Ritter.
"We got to beat Hanchett for the Legislature," said Rupert. "He's been in there so long that he's got careless, and I can't endorse his record anymore."
"You're right about that," Jonas exclaimed. "I haven't had any use for Hanchett since the papers told of his dealings with those companies; but he's got a lock on this district."
"Not so," replied Rupert; the right kind of man--one who listens to people--could beat Hanchett."
"Who's the right kind of man you're talking about?"
"Your neighbor, Adam Grimm."
Ritter rested his arms on the fence rail. "Adam's a good man; been here all his life, liked by everybody. Never has much to say, but when he does say something, people listen. Trouble is, I don't see any way to nominate him. At the convention, this district always gets run over."
"Looky here, Jonas; I'm looking for a man to beat Hanchett, a man people trust. I can get Adam nominated if you all back me. Think on it; I'll see you next time I'm by here."
Rupert discussed the subject with a few others during his sunny morning ride, always being careful to only suggest a possibility. Experience taught him you can't force people; when they think it's their idea, you'd be amazed at what they'll do, and hold still for.
Fourteen days went by before Rupert figured the time was right for another ride in the country; and again, Adam was in his field, spreading lime before planting.
"G'Mornin' Adam; you're working hard."
"G'Mornin'; those four days of rain put me behind and I need to get caught up."
"I guess Hanchett won't be going back to the Legislature, not if you care to go instead," Rupert remarked in an offhand way. "I've been hearing a lot of talk for you; people say you could give them a real good voice."
"There's been one or two come by here to talk," Grimm admitted.
"All you gotta do is come out and say you're a candidate," urged Rupert; "you'd be elected."
"I guess I'd have a decent chance," Adam said, "if I was nominated by the Party--not as an Independent. You know how the vote's gone here for generations--straight by the Party. Opposition could run Saint Peter against a Party jailbird . . . jailbird would win by a landslide every time!"
"I can get you the Party nomination, Adam."
"You?"
"Sure . . . just soon's you tell me you're a candidate."
Adam never said another word and went back to spreading lime on his field. There was an unflattering air to Adam's reaction, but a pragmatic facilitator cannot afford to be a sensitive soul. Rupert had reasons for Grimm to be a candidate; this time he'd listened longer than fourteen days ago. Time for Phase Two . . . time for a trusted accomplice, not known in these parts, to float the idea for a "Committee to Elect Adam Grimm" in such a way that Adam's neighbors thought it was their idea.
~
Deep down, Adam wanted to run, to be elected, to show his neighbors that he took their concerns to the State House for a fair hearing. But he wanted to be sure there'd be no entanglements. He found Rupert having two eggs--sunnyside--with a sausage and hash browns at Mack's Diner in town.
"Rupert, what's back of your offer? I feel like there's something I don't know, but that I should."
"Politics, Adam, just good politics. I want to send a good man to the Legislature to speak for the district."
"Yes--and then what?"
Rupert preferred not to give a direct answer. The fish was ready to take the bait--no sense scaring him off.
"It's just a question of beating Hanchett. He was all right at first, but now he's gone haywire; the only way we can get him out of there is to put up a good man to draw the solid country vote, and you're the man to do it."
"I'm not making any promises," Adam said.
"Have I asked for any?" Rupert replied.
"No you haven't, but I want this made clear--I won't run for the Legislature unless there's no strings!"
"Make it as clear as you like, Adam. You don't see where I or anyone else put a rope around your neck. Adam, your trouble is you've got wrong ideas from the media. They told so many lies about the Party and the people in it that you're making it hard for me to do a good thing for you and the district. Now, I'm offering you the nomination, and I'm not asking for a pledge of any sort. Do you want the nomination or don't you?"
"Yes, I want it--if it comes fair and proper."
The fish was hooked! Rupert knew it would happen.
"All right then; tell your friends you're going for it; ask them to spread the word. I'll do the rest."
"Grimm will be a bit hard to manage," he thought to himself, "but certainly not impossible. He's going to have to learn the facts of political life--sooner rather than later."
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Three days before the convention Rupert came by to visit with Adam, Mrs. Grimm, and their daughter Anna who worked as a shorthand stenographer for the evening newspaper in the city. Rupert casually mentioned that Adam had the nomination and was a lead-pipe cinch to be elected; they would be putting their heads together, guided by Rupert's judgment. He was especially attentive to Anna; she was of the outside world and would appreciate tales he told of life at the State Capital during Legislature session--far more attractive than her former monotonous life on the farm. She was her father's daughter in not saying much, but Rupert could see she was impressed.
The two men went to sit on the front porch, tilting their chairs back against the house.
"U.S. Senator be appointed next week in the Legislature," Rupert said. "We need someone who'll work for us, and get us our fair share. We need Ed Sparks."
Adam's amazement was obvious. "Sparks? I thought he withdrew his name after the ruckus about his taking pay-offs for certain votes in Congress. Sparks isn't the sort of man I can support; they'll have to screw him in the ground when he dies. And what's all this about putting our heads together and being guided by your judgment? That sounds like payment on a promise I told you I would never make."
"Those stories about pay-offs have no merit at all, Adam. They're baloney the media puts out to boost circulation. Ed Sparks knows that 'getting along' in Congress means 'going along.' As for pay-offs, where's the proof? The media can scream all they want, but where's the proof? I ask you, where's the proof?"
"It so happens, Rupert, Anna told me her newspaper will publish 14 sworn affidavits on Friday that give times, places, and dollar amounts of payoffs."
"Thanks for telling me, Adam. Tonight, I'll issue the usual denial statement over the Governor's signature, calling for an immediate investigation into allegedly forged documents. By the time investigation's done, people will have forgotten all about it. Meantime, it's important that Sparks gets to be Senator; I want to be sure you'll vote for him. I think you owe me that much."
"I don't owe you one blessed thing. You said you didn't want anything in return!"
"Not quite Adam; I said I hadn't asked for anything, but I must insist on this one."
"Rupert, is that all there is to my voting for Sparks? No other angles or something you're not telling me?"
"That's all there is, Adam." (He didn't say "this time" out loud.) "I gave you the nomination, a guarantee of election, and a soft berth at the Legislature in exchange for your vote; otherwise I'll throw it to Hanchett. Think on it, Adam, the Legislature is a lot to give up."
For some minutes Adam seemed in deep thought. Then--"Yes it is; I think I'll stick with it."
"So, you'll vote for Sparks?"
"No I won't. I'll go to the Legislature to vote as I think is right."
"Then you won't go at all Adam. I'll say you were so angry you couldn't get your way that you quit. You'll be all finished in politics. I'm sorry I wasted my time on you."
Adam reached over to tap on the window blinds. The blinds were raised, disclosing Mrs. Grimm and Anna sitting with their notebooks and pencils. Adam was rather pleased with himself. "When Anna was learning shorthand stenography, Mother learned it too so they could practice together. I guess that's what they've been doing now--practicing. These notebooks could make a good newspaper story, don't you think?"
Rupert was noted for being quick (some said "slippery" was a better word). "I don't suppose you'd consider trading those notebooks for--say--a chairmanship in the Legislature? No? I didn't think you would." How this old goat got him into this mess was more than he understood at the moment, but he was a realist.
"Mr. Grimm," he said, "let me shake the hand of our next legislator. It"s a real honor to know a man of such upstanding qualities and principles."
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